It’s done. But not really! I’m zipping out of town in a moment, and will rush back to be home on Sunday for the final webbie, so will just write a few thoughts now. Day-to-day over the last six months, I’ve seen not much progress, but now looking back over the entirety of the MKMMA experience, Wow!
I looked forward to the start with anticipation, knowing it’s where I belonged – remembering that “when the student is ready, the teacher will appear.” Now I know who the teacher is. I did a lot of fighting to not quit for the first several weeks, and I didn’t. I never got my DMP done, so most of the other exercises were lost on me – I have no idea what my PPN’s are or should be – most of the cement is still there. The poster board is still sitting in the corner waiting for the DMP which is waiting for the PPN’s .
I’ve been re-listening to the first several webinar recordings, which were so confusing to me at the beginning – they are starting to make some sense. Now I finally understand the compass thing!
I have gone through (and continue to go though) some of the most difficult times of my big-girl life since December, and I know I would not have handled it nearly as well if it hadn’t been for MKMMA. I have come across several people whom I’ve come to admire through the reading of their blogs (Monika, Jason H., MaryLou). I’ve come to think of Mark, Davene and Trish as friends. I thank Derek A. for sharing this with me last summer.
When I awake with anxiety in the wee hours, I can sometimes return to sleep remembering that I am whole, perfect, strong, powerful, loving, harmonious and happy. I think I now know what I’m pretending not to know. I think I know what the person I intend to become would do next. I’m looking forward to my 48 hours of solitude next month. I know that failure no longer is my payment for struggle, because I greet this day with love in my heart. I persist until I succeeds because I am nature’s great miracle, and want to always live each day as if it’s my last.
What does bring me to tears is that I feel like I know my Creator so much better than I did six months ago, and I know that I know that I know that He loves me and holds me in the palm of His hand, and I better know how to connect to His heart. Thank you, Mark, Davene, and the whole team for all of those things, and more!